


A Snail's Paced Day

by roseyanon



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, Post-Undertale Pacifist Route, collecting snails, just a chill fluffy fic, walk in the rain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-10-08
Packaged: 2020-02-09 21:47:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18646732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseyanon/pseuds/roseyanon
Summary: The surface is wonderful, and even on rainy days the brothers make the best of things to have a good time!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is based off a fanart by pucapuca on twitter, specifically:  
> https://twitter.com/pucapuca_game/status/984794184237236224  
> i want to figure out how to tell them they inspired me. maybe i will tweet my fic at them? or is that considered rude... i will have to think about it :3

"OH! LOOK AT _THAT_ ONE!"  
"nice."

It was a rainy summer day on the surface, and the skeleton brothers were having a pleasant walk through one of Asgore's gardens. Normally it would be packed with visitors from all over, humans and monsters alike, but despite the nice temperature the place was essentially deserted due to the rain. This time of year in particular was a popular time to observe the local butterfly population. The brothers however had their sights set on a different type of critter.

Sans reached out to the nearby flowering bush and plucked off a snail of decent size. The snail lazily curled into itself, and Sans carefully set the it into the lidded box Papyrus was holding open for him. "how many snails ya think it takes to make a pie anyway?" Papyrus shrugged, more focused on looking over the rest of the nearby foliage for any other snails. "MAYBE TWENTY OR SO? SHE MEASURES OUT THE SNAILS BY WEIGHT NOT QUANTITY, SO WHO KNOWS. LET'S NOT WORRY ABOUT THAT THOUGH! THE IMPORTANT THING IS WE'RE ENJOYING A NICE WALK TOGETHER." Sans smiled up at his brother. "yeah; was a real good idea to hit up the garden today. it's nice having the place to ourself. potentially getting some pie out of it is a pretty good bonus too."

Papyrus posed dramatically, holding the box of snails in a flexing type of pose. "OF COURSE! ANOTHER GREAT IDEA BY THE GREAT PAPYRUS! NYEH HEH HEH HEH!" Sans laughed as well, continuing to walk down the path. "'m probably gonna need a nap after all this walking though. and rainy day naps are extra hard to wake up from..."  
"WORRY NOT SANS!" Papyrus reassured. "I WILL MAKE SURE YOU WAKE UP IN TIME TO GET A FRESH SLICE OF PIE."  
"thanks bro; you're the best."  
"OF COURSE!"

-

The two wandered slowly from one plant to another, stopping occasionally to smell the literal roses. By the end of it they had "APPROXIMATELY 9.2 OUNCES!" of snails, and the rain had slowed to what the local humans referred to as 'spitting,' a term which Sans found hilarious and Papyrus disgusting.

Hanging out with his brother was always a good time, whether it was annoying him with bad jokes or even getting some physical exercise in. As such, it wasn't until Papyrus asked if he was feeling alright that Sans realized he had pushed this whole 'moving around' thing a little too far. Papyrus was leaning down to peer closely at his brother's face.

"YOU'RE GETTING THAT 'WEIRDLY PALE DESPITE BEING BONE' LOOK AGAIN. I TOLD YOU TO TELL ME IF YOU NEEDED A BREAK SANS!"  
"oh... sorry bro." Sans smiled tiredly up at Papyrus. "guess even at this snail's pace, we got further than i expected."  
"SANS!"  
"heh."  
"THAT ONE WAS ALMOST NOT TERRIBLE."  
"thanks."  
"WHICH MEAN YOU MUST BE _VERY_ TIRED!"

Sans laughed fully at that, and held up his arms to be picked up. "guess so; can we take a shortcut home?" Papyrus picked up Sans with one arm before walking through the kitchen entrance to the living room. "OH ALRIGHT, BUT JUST THIS ONCE! I'M GOING TO SET YOU IN THE FIREPLACE TO NAP THERE. I DON'T WANT YOU CATCHING ILL BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T PROPERLY DRIED OFF!" Sans sleepily nuzzled his brother's shoulder. "cool; thanks bro."  
"YOU ARE WELCOME SANS!"

Depositing his brother gently into the fireplace, Papyrus stood back up and watched fondly for a moment as Sans got comfortable in the magical flames Toriel had placed there. Being magical fire, and especially being magical fire created by Toriel of all monsters, the fire was perfectly safe. Boy had that been a surprise for the human to learn though! The first time Frisk saw Sans asleep in the fireplace, they had panicked and threw themself onto Sans to try and smoother the flames as they dragged him out towards "safety". Sans had been grumpy at first, still half asleep and thinking Frisk was just trying to steal his spot, but upon noticing how much the kid was shaking he woke up enough to explain and reassure Frisk that he was perfectly fine. The human had been reassured, but still seemed slightly nervous anytime they found Sans in the fireplace. As a result, Sans tried to not do it too often; but with the human out for the day, the brothers didn't have to worry about startling their friend again.

While the fire had healing properties, (thanks to Toriel being the sort of monster she was,) Papyrus felt fairly certain that just it being a warm place to nap would be all that was needed today. There were some days that Sans would lose track of his limits and push himself a tad too far; luckily he has such a great and cool brother looking out for him! Papyrus beamed, striking what he liked to call 'ENCOURAGING POSE #5!'

"YOU DID VERY WELL TODAY SANS, I'M PROUD OF YOU!"

Sans rolled over, not quite managing to hide his bashful smile. "thanks bro; i had fun. wake me up for pie, yeah?"  
"OF COURSE!"

And so reassured, Sans immediately fell asleep.

Nodding to himself in satisfaction, Papyrus headed to the kitchen to get things ready for Toriel when she got home.

~

In the end most of the snails they'd gathered weren't actually edible, but they'd had fun and there were enough snails on hand for a pie anyway, so the brothers decided to call it a win either way!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is it normal calling a very very light, (not even a drizzle,) rain, spitting? if not, hello! i am from the new england area of america and that is a legit category of rain :D what is it called in your area?
> 
> in writing this i tried looking up info about snails for culinary uses, and it seemed like maybe there's only a small handful of viable species? being monsters who grew up in the Underground and don't actually know how the pie is made, i liked the idea of them just grabbing any and all snails they see ☆  
> oh well, even if they cant use them for food, im sure asgore is happy to have less snails in his garden!
> 
> was papyrus using a shortcut understandable? i headcanon that he can do them too, just in a slightly different way from sans. it's less 'there's a moment of darkness' and more "we're already here, without so much as a blink" kind of thing. normally he doesnt take them, because it's very cheaty and lazy! but papyrus is willing to make an exception for his brother <3  
> (he'll also do it for a funny enough jape x3)
> 
> the line about the human seeing Sans asleep in a magic based fireplace and panicking also wasnt my idea; zarla came up with that one!  
> https://www.deviantart.com/zarla/art/Baked-bones-609522662?q=gallery%3Azarla&qo=0  
> ever since i read it i've thirsted for sans sleeping in magical fire. it just feels so cozy and safe to picture…! ;u; sadly that is the only instance i've heard of that headanon, so i imagine it's not a common idea ^_^() oh well
> 
> i've only written what, five stories? but i feel like im already predictable lol; both the brothers are there, and sans falls asleep at the end of the fic. i also live for sans making any kind of effort on anything, no matter how small or even accidental, and papyrus praising him for it! gotta give sans that positive reinforcement training xD
> 
> thank you for reading! i hope you enjoyed it ☆


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -that's a lot of leftover snails actually.

It was the next day and since not all of the snails were the kind Toriel used to make pies, the brothers had to decide what to do with the 'leftovers,' so to speak. Sans was curled around the bucket containing the snails, slowly adding lettuce leaves inside one at a time. Nearby, Papyrus paced as he thought out loud.  
  
"WELL I SUPPOSE WE COULD JUST SET THEM LOSE IN ONE SPOT. BUT NO ONE WOULD BE HAPPY TO FIND THEM IN THEIR GARDEN!"  
"yeah…"  
"PERHAPS IT COULD BE AN EXCUSE FOR A HIKING TRIP? THERE'S THAT NATURE TRAIL NOT TOO FAR OFF, WE COULD SCATTER THEM ALONG THE PATH!"  
"sure…"  
  
Papyrus paused in his pacing, squinting over at his brother. "DID YOU JUST AGREE TO GO ON A MILE LONG HIKE WITH ME?" Not even glancing up from the bucket, Sans added another leaf, clearly enraptured by the snails he was watching. "yup…" Papyrus watched his brother watch the snails for moment, before smirking. "AND AFTER THAT, I THINK IT'D BE A PERFECT TIME TO PARSE DOWN YOUR SOCK COLLECTION!"  
"…not a chance bro."  
"?!?!"  
Sans snickered as his brother sputtered and stomped his feet in mock anger.  
  
"SANS! WERE YOU PAYING ATTENTION OR NOT?!"  
"ok, i may have spaced out for most of that. but just look at these little guys! they don't even have teeth and they're just munching away. i thought maybe they'd eat by dissolving stuff in slime? but this is pretty cool too." Papyrus sighed, shaking his head. "OF COURSE YOU WOULD FIND SUCH SLIMEY CREATURES INTERESTING. BUT THERE'S NO WAY WE'RE KEEPING THEM HERE, SO WHERE SHOULD WE RELEASE THEM?" Sans minutely frowned, almost seeming to be looking in the bucket to avoid Papyrus's gaze rather than to just keep snail watching.  
"… why can't we just keep 'em?"  
Papyrus tilted his skull slightly, staring at his brother curiously.  
  
"BECAUSE," he began slowly, wanting to not phrase this too harshly.  
"IF WE KEPT THEM, I'D END UP BEING THE ONE HAVING TO TAKE CARE OF THEM. AND I HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN SEEING TO WHATEVER NEEDS A SNAIL MIGHT HAVE."  
  
The quiet that followed felt heavy and tense. Sans was still frowning at the snails, and Papyrus really hoped his brother wasn't going to try and argue about it. Sans had been known to get away with things he really shouldn't have from time to time, (those large sockets worked wonders for sad puppy dog eyes,) but Papyrus wasn't going to be budging on this. The only slime producing creature he was interested in taking care of was his brother, the snails would have to fend for themselves! Thankfully, Sans's shoulders untensed, and he sadly muttered, "ok."  
  
Papyrus also relaxed, and pet Sans's skull encouragingly. "THANK YOU FOR BEING UNDERSTANDING ABOUT THIS SANS. MAYBE YOU COULD DO 'RESCUE' MISSIONS FROM ASGORE'S GARDEN TO REHOME SNAILS? THAT WAY YOU CAN STILL HAVE FUN SEEING THEM REGULARLY!" Papyrus hated to see his brother feeling down, but was mostly relieved he wasn't going to wake up with escaped snails sliming their way up the walls. Thankfully the suggestion seemed to have worked, and Sans smiled up at him with a small but genuine grin. "that could be kinda cool. good idea bro."  
  
Delighted to be back on the same page again, Papyrus grinned victoriously. "OF COURSE! I AM FULL OF GOOD IDEAS AS WELL AS CALCIUM!"  
"heh, sure are. oh man, speaking of calcium, did you know snails need calcium too? they use it to make their shells harder. i guess they eat eggshells somehow? i wonder if that makes a crunching sound or-"  
  
As Sans continued to talk about snails, Papyrus mentally sighed but paid attention. It would be rude to space out, and Papyrus is a Perfectly Polite monster! And anyway, at least it wasn't puns.  
  
-  
  
Ultimately it was decided to scatter the snails along the nature hike after all, with the understanding that Sans would be taking regular breaks via being carried by Papyrus so as to avoid any overexertion like what had happened while collecting the snails in the first place. And this time, their friend Frisk would be joining them! (Technically speaking they were babysitting Frisk, but no one besides Toriel called it that.) It was an overcast day, but according to the weather reports there wouldn't be anymore rain. The air was still damp smelling though, and under the cover of the trees the smell of moist dirt and rotting leaves was quite refreshing. The human climbed on top of just about every rock they spotted, claiming it was a human instinct. The brothers decided they still didn't know enough about humans to claim bullshit or not, so let them do their thing.  
  
"Fallen Log spotted! Deploy snails!"  
"snails: deploying."  
  
Next to said rotting log, Sans squatted down and carefully placed a handful of snails, occasionally petting a few of their shells. "bye larry. bye curly. bye moe."  
"SANS, STOP NAMING THE SNAILS AS YOU RELEASE THEM!"  
"but this is their last chance to get a name bro."  
"BUT IT'S WEIRD! WE WERE ALL SET TO EAT THEM IN A PIE AND NOW THEY HAVE NAMES??"  
  
Frisk held out their arms pacing along the log, pretending they were balancing at a great hight rather than maybe six inches off the ground. "They WERE going to be pie, but they didn't so now they get names. It's like when you get chickens: egg chickens get names, roast chickens don't."  
"see bro? frisk gets it."  
Papyrus sighed, rolling his eyes. "FINE, FINE. HOW MANY MORE ARE LEFT? WE'RE ALMOST TO THE END OF THE TRAIL." Frisk peered into the bucket. "I think it's like eight or so- hey wait a minute." Frowning, they stared hard at the snails. "Where's the big one?"  
  
Sans casually stood up and ambled over to his brother. "which big one?"  
"The REALLY big one! I wanted to put that one somewhere really cool, like maybe up in a tree."  
"I DO NOT THINK SNAILS LIVE IN TREES THOUGH? IT MUST HAVE JUST BEEN RELEASED WITH ONE OF THE OTHER BATCHES."  
"No way, I was keeping an extra eye out for that one."  
"oh well," Sans shrugged, giving a wink. "guess that snail gave ya the slip. don't feel too bad, i've heard they can be slippery." Frisk frowned, even as Papyrus began scolding his brother. They supposed it's possible it could have just snuck out, but Frisk still thought it weird that a snail could be so sneaky.  
  
The rest of the hike went smoothly and the last of the snails were unleashed upon the unsuspecting forest. Sans spent the entire walk back being carried, and occasionally rubbing at his eye socket.  
-  
  
It was weeks latter, 2:47 A.M., and Papyrus was frowning at the TV. The TV wasn't even on, Papyrus had just gotten tired of frowning at the walls, his computer, and the kitchen.  
  
Something was up with Sans.  
  
There was a certain kind of giddiness to his brother when he was up to something, like the combination of shenanigans and secrets produced a gas that buoyed Sans. It had been a while since Sans had pulled any big pranks, so like a good sport Papyrus had waited to see what happens when the trap is sprung.  
And waited. And waited.  
  
It had started the very night they had rehomed all those snails; Papyrus assumed it would be some good natured ribbing to reduce any leftover bad feelings for having to say goodbye to Sans's new slimey friends. Then when a few days latter nothing had happened, Papyrus had gotten nervous, and decided to be constantly vigilant! But even he got tired of always being on guard, and so dropped down to normal-level vigilance. And still NOTHING. No whoopie cushions, no trip wires, no relabeled ingredients or furniture moved around. Nothing, zilch, nada. And now here he was, half a month latter, unpranked and too anxious to sleep even though it was his sleep night. Papyrus scrubbed at his face in frustration, before standing up with a sigh. He'd check if Sans happened to be awake, and if not just hang out till he was. Whatever jape he had planned, Papyrus felt certain that Sans wouldn't want Papyrus losing sleep over it.  
  
As he made his way up the stairs, Papyrus debated with himself if maybe the anticipation was the revenge? But that didn't feel like Sans's style at all. Even if that was what he was up to, the novelty of doing nothing would have worn off by now. That enthusiastic twinkle in his brother's sockets was too genuine for such a low energy ploy. Once at Sans's room, Papyrus went in without knocking, not wanting to wake him up if he was still asleep. Looking over at Sans's bed though, Papyrus felt his breath catch in his throat.  
  
The bed was empty.  
  
For a moment Papyrus just stood frozen in the doorway, gloved hand clutching the doorknob. Okay, so Sans wasn't in his room even though it was about three in the morning. That's fine! It's just… different. Sans doesn't like to leave the house once it gets late, especially when it's Papyrus's sleep nights, but still! Nothing to panic over! It's fINE-  
  
Sans suddenly appeared in the middle of his room, his back to the door.  
  
Papyrus couldn't make a sound, feeling overcome with shock at Sans's sudden appearance and relief at seeing him safe at home where he's SUPPOSED to be. Sans clearly had no idea Papyrus was right behind him and had started snickering quietly, slightly hunched over something he was carefully carrying. The source of the secret prank perhaps? Papyrus grinned. Busted brother!  
  
Sans set down a- clear box? Glass tank? Whatever it was, he was smiling at it proudly. Papyrus boggled, wondering why his brother was hauling around a container of what looked to be dirt and plants. Secret gardening? Before Papyrus could ponder on it much further, Sans had pulled off a mitten and was-  
-reaching into one of his eye sockets?!?  
"ok lil fella, let's get you back inside safe an' sound."  
"SANS WHAT THE HECK!?"  
  
Said brother jumped and ripped his hand quickly out of his eye socket, shoving the hand behind him as he spun around to face Papyrus.  
"aH! bro! what… w-what's up?"  
"I NEEDED TO TALK TO YOU, BUT DID YOU SERIOUSLY STORE SOMETHING IN YOUR SKULL?! FOR GOODNESS SAKE SANS YOU'RE NOT A BABYBONES AND YOUR SKULL ISN'T AN INVENTORY SLOT!" Sans flustered, frowning and sweating.  
"i-i know that! it was just for a little while, it's fine… anyway that doesn't matter! what're you doing up bro? it's your sleep night." Papyrus rolled his eyes, putting a hand on his hip. "YES IT IS. WHICH IS WHY I CAME TO SEE YOU; I COULDN'T SLEEP, AND I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU." If Papyrus thought Sans had been looking guilty before, now he looked almost miserable with guilt. A second too late Papyrus remembered that Sans could be sensitive about not being there for his brother. Which Papyrus appreciated, don't get him wrong! But he wasn't a babybones, and he didn't need Sans to hold his hand 24/7. Before Papyrus could say as much though, he noticed _something moving in Sans's socket dear angel wHAT._  
  
"sorry about that papyrus…" Sans began, not seeming to have noticed his brother had just mentally blue screened. "i… i've kinda been working on something? but i didn't want to tell you and have you freak out-" Just then Sans was interrupted by the feeling of something slowly crawling out of his skull and Papyrus shrieking.  
  
"WHAT THE HECK IS IN YOUR SOCKET?!"  
-  
  
From there things had been explained quite quickly, that is after Papyrus had a chance to flail around in disgust. Sans had hid the snail in his skull during the hike, and had gotten into the habit of bringing the snail with him occasionally so that he could play with the snail and not get bored at work. Papyrus had spent a good while berating him about the hygienics of it; at first Sans had argued back, explaining that he didn't wear his food mittens while playing with Conerad (the snail's name,) and that he always washed up before and after touching Conerad. (Both to avoid accidentally feeding anyone snail slime, but also so that nothing could get on the snail that might hurt them.) After a while though Sans decided to just let Papyrus get it out of his system, staring down into Conerad's terrarium. As Conerad was investigating his water dish, Sans noticed that Papyrus seemed to have stopped. Quietly, not willing to look up, Sans asked, "are you gonna make me get rid of him?"  
  
Papyrus stared at Sans for a long moment. As weird as it was, Sans REALLY seemed to like his pet. Not to mention he'd apparently been taking good care of the snail for almost a month… Instead of answering, Papyrus stalled by asking, "WHERE WERE YOU EARLIER? WAS IT SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE SNAIL?" Sans nodded, reaching in to gently pet Conerad's shell. "yeah. his tank needs to be cleaned pretty regularly, so i've been doing it every time it's your sleep night to be safe." Papyrus silently boggled at that. His brother? Cleaning regularly?! Sans quietly scoffed, and Papyrus looked over to see his brother frowning dejectedly at him. "don't gotta look so surprised bro. i decided to keep him, which means conerad is depending on me. i'm not gonna get a pet that NEEDS me just to let them rot." Briefly Papyrus thought of Sans' pet rock… but Rocky didn't actually NEED those sprinkles. They were just one of many silly little jokes between the brothers. This snail though wasn't just some dumb gag… Sans clearly cared about- ugh, Conerad quite a bit.

"SANS… I STILL DON'T LIKE THE IDEA OF THERE BEING A SNAIL IN THE HOUSE. THEY'RE JUST… REALLY REALLY GROSS? BUT!" he hastily continued, seeing Sans practically wilt. "IF YOU KEEP HIM IN HIS CASE WHILE INSIDE. AND STOP STORING HIM IN YOUR DANG SKULL! THEN. I SUPPOSE, THERE'S NO REAL REASON YOU CANNOT KEEP CONERAD."  
  
Sans almost seemed to have not really heard him at first, and had slumped over the tank. Then he suddenly sat upright, staring at his brother with wide eye sockets. "-whoa wait! really? i can keep him?!" Sans quickly set the tank aside and practically jumped up to give Papyrus a massive hug. "thankyou thankyou thankyou!" Laughing, Papyrus hugged his brother back, nuzzling the top of San's skull. "YOU'RE WELCOME SANS! IF YOU CAN JUST CONTINUE TO KEEP YOUR SNAIL WHERE I DON'T HAVE TO SEE IT, THEN THIS SHOULD WORK OUT JUST FINE."  
"no worries bro! i made a really good hidden nook for his tank. you'll never even notice he's there!"  
  
There was a quiet moment of peace, both feeling reassured by the positive intentions being shared by their hug. A thought occurred to Papyrus though, and he pulled back to stare at Sans quizzically.  
  
"-WAIT A SECOND, WE'VE HAD SNAIL PIE SINCE THEN."  
"…? yeah? so?"  
"ISN'T IT WEIRD EATING SOMETHING THE SAME SPECIES AS YOUR PET?!"  
"nah. i don't get to know those snails. but if conerad had ruined snail pie, he really would have been a snailure of a pet."  
  
Papyrus slam dunked his brother onto his mattress and stomped off to his own bed. At least now if he couldn't sleep, he could blame it on having heard such a stars awful pun right before bed! Sans shrugged and laughed to himself. "eh, everyone's a critic."  
  
Conerad minded his own business and munched on some celery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this second chapter brought to you by Gilded_Pleasure! (okay, and me cause i wrote it.) they got me pumped for 'what if there was MORE SNAIL SHENANIGANS' and off i went xD tbh i feel like maybe there could have been more? but im gonna post this instead of hording it forever (which is what i realized i was about to do lol)


End file.
